Mother's Advice
by SireesAnwar
Summary: Ronon was separated from the team after being wounded. Has Ronon loses blood he talks with his dead mother about living and taking a chance with his heart. RononJennifer


**Story Notes:**  
I ran with a challenge... "One of the characters hallucinates, or really sees, the apparition of their mother, whether she's dead or just back on their home planet, and they try to make peace with her over something they feel guilty about."

* * *

He hated this part. Hiding. Trying to remain as still as possible while the thing hunting you got close enough for you to smell. And he could smell the Wraith as it moved over the area so sure that he was there. Well it was right, and if it didn't leave soon it wouldn't matter if it found him because he was losing blood rapidly. He wasn't sure how much longer he'd remain conscious.

Everything was supposed to be so simple. Go to the planet, get the information, and go back to Atlantis. There wasn't even supposed to be Wraith, let alone gun fire or the sword battle he'd participated in with no less than five Wraiths.

He was good with his sword but he could only take so many.

As he's swung around to take the head off one disgusting creature, another had come at his back and stabbed him. He'd fought that one off but had realized immediately after the only way he'd fight again was to get to Atlantis and to Dr. Keller.

He could still hear the screams of the people as the Wraith tore through the villages, through the people, feasting on just about anything that came into their path.

He shifted was a small grunt. Blood was seeping into the dirt beneath him, leaving it sticky and slightly muddy. He could smell the grass, so close to his face that it felt like he was breathing it.

The bits of tree he'd wedged himself into smelled rotten and musty. His vision was beginning to spot though he hadn't yet decided if it was because of blood loss or the sprinkles that had started coming from the sky.

Rain wasn't his friend right now, though it would likely make finding him much harder. He already felt cold from the loss of blood and being soaked wouldn't help.

He closed his eyes again, gritting his teeth through the surge of pain. Another scar. Another thing to remind him why he wanted all the Wraith dead.

He knew they were out there. There would be more of them this time. They didn't want to risk losing him again. He knew that to be true. They were impressed by his ability to fight them off. Like he really gave a damn about any of that. He just hoped he died before they found him. He didn't really want to die. He hadn't told her he liked seeing her. He'd made so many excuses to go to the infirmary, half the time finding her too busy for in inconsequential reason for being there. But he liked watching her.

He had to get back. It had been nearly a day and he couldn't pull himself out of his hiding spot. He kept telling himself Sheppard would find him. Sheppard wouldn't leave a man behind, but he was beginning to doubt even that. He hurt all over and was extremely cold despite the warmth of the air. The rain hadn't really been anything more than a small summer storm, and yet the slight dampness that still clung to his cloths made him feel like his body temperature was rapidly decreasing.

He flexed his fingers but they felt strangely detached from the rest of him. He brought his hand up to his face and tried to breath on them. He couldn't do it.

"Here, let me, little one." His mother was kneeling by him now, rubbing his hand between her own.

"I'm not little."

"You haven't been little since you were 10. You grew so fast; far too fast for a mother's liking."

"Mom." He rasped.

"Shh, my love. I'm here."

He closed his eyes tightly. She was there; sitting over him looking alive but for the wound in her chest. The memories it evoked.

"You can't be here."

"Well I am."

He shook his head. "You died. I saw you."

"Yes, and you still blame yourself as if you alone should have saved every Satedan on our world." Her hand smoothed the raindrops from his forehead.

"No, but I couldn't save my team, my family, Melena."

His mother was quiet and he opened his eyes. "Mom."

"What do you want me to say? No, you didn't save us?" She leaned down bringing her face to his. "You were right about me being here. Still I think you know not even you friend Sheppard could have saved everyone he loved in such a situation."

Tears leaked form his eyes. "But I…"

"Ronon, you are too hard on yourself. You always were."

He didn't say anything. He didn't know what to say.

"Why don't we talk about Jennifer?"

Ronon groaned. She'd done this with Melena. Just known he'd been interested. She'd been there at the gathering when Ronon had first been introduced to Melena. He could still feel his mother's eyes burrowing into him, seeing his heart.

"You've said nothing to her?"

"No." He turned his head away.

"Why?"

Ronon turned to look at her. "She's a doctor too. She's smart. She could do better."

"Melena never thought she could find anyone better than you."

Ronon closed his eyes. "She could have."

"Ronon." She stared down at him and then leaned over him, kissing his forehead. "You know first hand life is too short to doubt the heart. Tell her." She pulled back and rose to her feet.

He shifted. "Mom." His voice came out as a croak. "Don't leave."

She smiled down at him. "But you don't need me anymore. Your friends are here."

Ronon looked the opposite direction, now hearing the heavy crunch of footfall on twigs and leaves. "Ronon!"

"Mom." He turned back, but there was no one. He was alone again, though not for long. He wanted to push himself up. To yell out to Sheppard but he couldn't and yet he did feel warmer.

"Over here." He heard Sheppard voice before the leaves around his hiding place stirred. "Found you, Big Guy. Hold on."

She stepped into view. God, was it safe for her to be here? Yes, the team surrounded her but a stray blast and she was gone. He groaned.

"Shh. I'm here." She moved her hands over his body searching for the wound. Everything hurt except where she touched.

"Don't die."

Jennifer smiled down at him. "Am I not supposed to say that to you, the man bleeding before me?" She quirked an eyebrow, which on her never looked stern only like she was on the verge of smiling or laughing at any moment.

"You could, but I don't plan too, now. Besides, I haven't gotten the chance to tell you why I show up in the infirmary all the time."

She was making sure he was stable. Waving in the stretcher to carry him away, injecting him with medicine, keeping her mind on her work. "I figured you were a hypochondriac like Rodney."

Ronon let out a small bark of laughter and then groaned. "No."

"Why then?"

"I like watching you."

Sheppard snorted. "Stalker."

Jennifer smiled down at him. "I have to give you something to make you sleep." She sighed and it warmed him to feel her breath on his face. "I like that you watch me, Ronon, and I don't plan on dying either."

He felt the small sting and he let his body drift off into the comfort of a healing sleep, content to know the moment he could leave the infirmary he'd be taking Jennifer with him.


End file.
